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The Daily Clog, January 1988, Volume 4, Number 7

The Daily Clog has uncovered the results of a survey of cloggers that was done a few years ago at the Clog Palace. No one knows why the results were never published, but thanks to the hard-hitting clog journalism for which The Daily Clog is known, they can now be shared with all cloggers.

When the survey was distributed, it was a fairly slow night at the Clog Palace. One might think that it would have had a detrimental effect on the survey, however, one respondent commented, "you picked a good night...only the hard-core [cloggers] are here!"

From the results of the clogging survey, The Daily Clog has come up with a composite sketch of the typical(?) clogger who responded to the survey, and who from now on will be referred to as the "Unknown Clogger." So, read on and enjoy! You might see yourself in the responses. If you think that anything was left out, please write to The Daily Clog and add to the legend and lore of the Unknown Clogger.

Question: Why do you clog?
"Why not? It's great fun, being with enjoyable people. My feet get happy and I can't help it. I have an obsession to do it, and it keeps the bottoms of my feet from itching so bad."

Question: How does clogging effect you, for better or worse, in the following areas: Physical, Psychological, and Social?

Physical: "I feel exhilarated and energized [even if] I may have arrived [at the Clog Palace] tired. It's good exercise! It makes me sweat, breathe hard, improves my stamina and makes my knees sore--just like sex!"

Psychological: "It gives me confidence and a high without any drugs or alcohol. It 'unclogs' the mind and creates a better attitude about life. It lets you be yourself and even more strange. Since I started dancing at the Clog Palace, with the disco ball revolving and the multi-colored reflected lights flashing, my nightmares have stopped."

Social: "It's my main social function. I clog with lots of nice people. It provides an opportunity to flirt harmlessly. It helps me develop and refine my social skills--[I've had] only three dates since I started [clogging] eight years ago."

Finally, when asked for any other comments, the Unknown Clogger replied, "If I had to do it over, I'd make the same mistake."

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   February 22, 2018
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